“We’re a nation hungry for more joy: because we’re starving from a lack of gratitude.” ~ Brené Brown, The Gifts of Imperfection

Have you ever felt like this – running on empty and uncertain how to fill your tank? 

Evidence suggests that 72% of leaders feel used up at the end of their day.

Simply having an attitude of gratitude isn’t enough, as it often fails to translate into meaningful or relatable actions.

An attitude is a way of thinking, and while it’s undoubtedly important, the real magic happens when that mindset is put into action. People who integrate their gratitude into daily practices—like journaling, meditation, prayer, or simply expressing their thankfulness out loud—not only experience greater happiness but also cultivate a deeper sense of joy.

As part of November’s Community of Practice, Christa Williams, Sophia’s Executive Director & Learning Facilitator, invited participants to find moments of reflection, gratitude, and genuine connection with others to help transform holiday overwhelm into overjoy.

If you find yourself in a state of overwhelm currently, pause here and make some notes of actions you could take to bring more reflection, gratitude, or connection into your day or week. 

How can gratitude help you give thanks?

For many people, “thanks-giving” is a tradition that happens around the dinner table once a year. However, why wait and hold it all in for this once-a-year holiday?

Research shows significant benefits for leaders (and their teams) when gratitude is expressed in the workplace year-round.

Gratitude doesn’t have to be limited to the big things.

It can be small everyday moments!

Leaders who express appreciation are more influential, respected, and happier. In a Glassdoor survey, 81% of employees said they would work harder for a grateful boss. 

Check-in with yourself using these Harvard-backed ways to cultivate gratitude:

1. Write Thank-You Notes: A handwritten note to someone who’s made a difference can change your day—and theirs.
2. Mental Thanks: No time to write? Just take a moment to mentally acknowledge someone who’s helped you.
3. Count Your Blessings: Write down three things you’re grateful for. The more specific, the better.
4. Prayer and Meditation: Spend time in prayer or a mindfulness exercise, focusing on what brings you joy.

The Secret of Joy

“… the process of change starts in here, in the servant, not out there. This is a difficult concept for the busy-body, modern man/woman. So it is with joy. Joy is inward, it is generated inside. It is not found outside and brought in.” ~ Robert Greenleaf

Just as attitude differs from behavior, happiness and joy are not the same.

Happiness is situation-based. I can be happy to receive a promotion at work or a gift from a friend or family member.  

Joy, on the other hand, is a step beyond happiness. Or, it might be like what Greenleaf referenced in this quote…it is found inside us. It is connected to our heart, contentment, and gratitude.  

Research shows we need both happiness and joy in our lives.

• Gratitude leads to more happiness and eases depression. (Harvard Health)
• Gratitude leads to better, more restful sleep. (Forbes)
• Gratitude gives you more impulse control. (Time)
• Gratitude improves romantic relationships. (Berkeley)
• Gratitude can even reduce your blood pressure. (Positive Psychology)

Overcome stress and overwhelm with gratitude

Several years ago, a TV broadcaster was talking about happiness when he suddenly suffered an anxiety attack on air (More on Dan Harris’ inspiring story). It scared him enough to find practices that would help him tame anxiety and stress. 

What he found was what these practices created more happiness and joy in his life!  

One practice is 5-3-1 from the Center for Healthy Minds at the University of Wisconsin-Madison.

5…Meditate 5 minutes per day. 

For many people, focusing on the breath or taking a break from your to-do list helps de-stress and calm the mind.

3…Write down 3 good things that happened today. 

Previous research in individuals suggests a positive relationship between gratitude and higher levels of well-being.

1…Do 1 act of kindness. 

Try holding the door for the person behind you or paying someone a heartfelt compliment or a generous act like buying someone a cup of coffee.

Another way to overcome stress comes from author, researcher, and storyteller, Brené Brown, who recently wrote an article called, Stressed and Overwhelmed: 10 Learnings That Changed How I Think About Emotions.

This article helps shape our understanding of stress and feelings of overwhelm, which are based on her book, Atlas of the Heart.

“Feeling both stressed and overwhelmed is about our narrative of emotional and mental depletion — there’s just too much going on to manage effectively. Naming the emotion helps us understand how to move through it.” ~ Brené Brown

What other practices would you add for accessing gratitude and joy? What’s worked for you?

What I carry: Gratitude in everyday life

Sometimes it is hard to be grateful, especially when things are not going the way we wish or when our plate is so full that we don’t have time or attention to even spend reflecting on what we are grateful for.

What might change if we look at all we carry WITH gratitude?

Carrie Newcomer is a Grammy acknowledged, Emmy awarded artist with 20 nationally released albums. She has become a national voice for finding how we still connect at the heart of the human story. 

Recently she hosted an interactive poetry project on her Substack page called “What I Carry.”

The idea behind this project was to create one long poem from all of her follower’s contributions that finishes the line “What I carry…”

Here are a few examples —

• “What I carry is my father’s crooked smile.”
• “What I carry is the hope for a better world.”
• “What I carry is watching my daughter’s joy as she pedals down the sidewalk on her red two-wheeler bike.”

We invite you to reflect and write your own version of “What I Carry…”

The sentence can be funny or fun, tender or bittersweet. It can be about loss or new understanding and beginnings. It can be anything. Try to keep it to one line- but more is alright!

Leading with gratitude during the holiday season

The holidays are not only a time to connect with the people we cherish most but also a season that often adds extra demands to our already full personal and professional plates.

The antidote to a full plate?

= Finding moments of reflection, gratitude and genuine connection with others to transform holiday overwhelm into overjoy. 

Leading with gratitude every day helps individuals feel happier, improves one’s sense of well-being, raises self-esteem, lowers depression and anxiety, and improves sleep quality. This is not only for the leader, but also for the individuals and team members around that leader! 

As 2024 draws to a close, it’s never too late to take action! Use and share these practices to find and share happiness, joy, and gratitude in your personal and professional life!

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What have you learned from this blog? Let us know!

Don’t miss your opportunity to join our next conversation! Community of Practice sessions are amazing opportunities for any and all leaders to gather and learn from one another in a supportive, comfortable environment, right from your computer. We will be off the month of December – stay tuned for what’s next in 2025!

Additional Resources:

1. 3 Steps to Manage Overload When You Have Too Much on Your Plate
2. How to Show More Gratitude at Work: Giving Thanks Makes You a Better Leader
3. Stressed and Overwhelmed: 10 Learnings That Changed How I Think About Emotions by Brené Brown
4. Community Poetry Project – What I Carry by Carrie Newcomer

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This blog post wraps up November 2024’s Community of Practice conversation. To join us during the live discussion for future months, register at https://www.sophiapartners.org/events/. This program occurs the fourth Tuesday of each month from 11:30 a.m.-12:30 p.m. CT via Zoom.